Well, my relationship with a Islam more or less started with the 9/11 attacks. I was young and in school a lot of the hijabis were get I go attack and I would get upset of the guys being mean to them. I remember coming home and telling my Mom about how mean the guys were. One day I got so sick of it and defended a girl and was sent to the office for "fighting". I came home that day and my mom was upset and embarrass of my actions. I explains to her but eh insisted that it was none of my business and it should remain that way. I didn't care. When the attacks happen my Mom started becoming more and more religious--Catholic. To be honest I hated it. She would make us sit around her and listen to her read the bible. I didn't hate it because it was religion, but rather because to me it didn't make sense. Catholicism since I was little never made sense. During this time I also found myself distancing more from religion and becoming more rebellious. I was distancing from a particular religion and learning about the many religions.
During high school I started learning about social movements in the US but also from "Third World" countries. From that I learned about Cuba, Mexico, etc mostly concentrating in the Latino America. I started becoming socially aware and learning to care more about those who are not as fortunate as I am and about those who improved political and economic situations.
In college one day as I was walking across campus I saw a hijabi with a flag holding it high and yelling to stop the war in the Gaza Strip. My first reaction was 'what is wrong with her?' I also acknowledged my ignorance since I didn't recognize that flag and I had no clue what she was referring to. I then walked to her organizations table and asked what was going on. They gave me a quick 15minute lecture of the Palestinian-Israeli conflict. I joined the organization and become an advocate for Palestine.
Through my independent study of the Palestinian issue I came through a lot of words that I don't know: intifada, Al- Aqsa, jihad, ramadan, etc. I started searching And with that came learning more about Islam.
Little by little without wanting I started to live Islam. I found myself contemplating about converting but I was too scared. I was scared because Of my family, friends and because I didn't feel I deserved Islam I was to imperfect. I was drinking, I had a boyfriend who I was engage to. I thought about how I would give islam a bad bad name. So, I didn't.
I then came to San Francisco last year for school. One of the days during my lunch I was going to buy lunch and at the convenience store a brother, Qais, saw my phone and saw that I had a gentleman is Arab clothing. He asked me if I was Muslim, I said 'no, but that I knew a lot.' Qais and his friend Sammy continued to talk to me about Islam and converting.
Sammy was leaving to Yemen for Ramadan and I told him that before he left I wanted to take Shahada and learn to pray. And on May 23, 2014 I took shahada. Alhamdullilah!!! The happiest day of my life. The day that I waited for so long and never though I would see it coming.
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